apprehensions

somehow i found the will to go on

and let go of all that bound me to that old hearth...

i was not to be disappointed in my decision;

as i found you waiting outside the next road...

you looked happy in your dazzling attire,

but shed a small tear on my tattered look...

could you ever imagine how happy i was, though;

it was my resolve to find a new road to tread on

that made you all the more happy and dazzling...

i could have taken you along and remained happy

for all the time that is left of this resurrected body.

but i would never be so selfish and greedy

so as to keep you away from your loved ones...

i know how you cherish and love them

and have remained their pillar of strength...

they would, certainly, go astray in your absence.

that apprehension made me run a long run

it was devoid of fun, frolic and invigoration...

and i have learned my lessons the hard way...

may be i should stop believing what i only apprehend

because i am again running a lonely race......

........dedicated to the SAD phase of everybody's life...

meeting my death

Edit
i happen to meet my death!!!
by Aasif Khanday on Monday, August 8, 2011 at 4:59am

there was a moment: of exasperation

and of a feeling as if i saw death looking down at my face...

that moment came, after a long night's sleep

when normally i should have been feeling soberer-

than any other night where i switch my sides a hundred time-

but i felt the urge to go back to sleep...

to that world, where there is all so black and white-

but yes, sometimes my dreams are in color also

though blurred, shady and entertaining miserly-

and mostly i get to play by my own rules...

i would visit a place and not worry about money;

i would go out with a girl and not worry about its consequences;

i would build a garden and cherish its shade;

i would through a party and be the chief entertainer;

i would make friends with everyone and foes with none;

i would just fly and go to my dear ones;

i would think...and it would just happen.......

so why would i want to wake up from that world,

where there is everything in my control?

for all that i had left behind the night before i slept?

that may be right, as i do love those who shower their love on me...

and want to live for them, for so long as the providence helps it...

but just for once, the day i over-slept........

i did not want to come from my dreamy stupor...

i wanted to live for myself and forget about the world...

as soon as i was back to the dreamland,

i saw death staring me in my face....

no color was there, no whiteness either...

it was all so black with none of my dreamland-rules working...

i was only too happy to bid the sleep adieu...

and since then, my sleep hasn't been my best escape

to all the worries that threaten my happy survival...

the idea of nilam k

Edit
taking a straight line is not always profitable...
by Aasif Khanday on Friday, August 12, 2011 at 6:15pm

Not to be cowed down easily,

I thought of an escape from the struggle

Lest it changes me for the worse.

And in a flash, i understood thus:

Moving in a straight line isn't always profitable...

Killing time and abusing it well,

Around my life's journey has fared much.

Kissing a frog would it tantamount,

Ask me if the trend would continue.

Towards a goal of self-aggrandisement

I hope i wont sacrifice my soul....

.........dedicated to all those who have a bright doze of selflessness to their nature...

.........especially to the one that this is intended to...